Time Constraints

This reflection is on my participation in various aspects of classes this semester. I knew that when I entered this program that the work load was going to be intense, however the intensity is more than I anticipated. Here is the challenge. I teach and have approximately 200 students that I am responsible for teaching science and technology to. I can not short change them to ensure that I met the deadlines and read the copious amount of books for these classes. My students are important to me and this program has reinforced that. The program has already had an affect on my teaching in that I am more actively involved with my students and their education. This has introduced more requirements for my time in planning and communicating with the students and their families. On top of this, I am trying to read the large number of books and articles required for the classes. Then you top it off by the reflections we are supposed to write for each class and the projects required. Finally you add the time spent on putting together a well thought out, meaningful action research project and you find that you have a 90 hour week just for work and school. Add to that the time spent with my family and you see the challenge I face. How do you balance all that and maintain your health and sanity? It is not nor has it ever been my intention to shirk my duties to my students or this program but there is just so much I can do. I feel that I have given my best in all areas of study and work. The people being short changed on my time are my family. They are willing to give up our time so that I can complete the program and they understand the importance of this for me. Know that I am doing the best I can and will continue to participate to the fullest extent allowed by time constraints.

3N Adventure

This blog posting will cover a couple days and different thoughts about the current learning adventure I am taking part in.

Day 1: Getting the News!

I have to say as I read the information about the new adventure I am apprehensive. As I read through the directions, my mind moves to the turtle quilt project and the frustration I felt during that time. My thoughts immediately go to, great here we go again. A project with little success for me. The reason for this is simply based on past experience. Experience one: The one area of problem solving I have always struggled with is the "what comes next in the sequence" activities. Experience two: The turtle adventure with the quilt building. There was success with the adventure but it took many hours of frustration. In fact, I can honestly say that it will be a day or two before I look at this program.

Day 2: Starting the Adventure.

I finally let go of my fear and apprehension and loaded the file for the next adventure. I have printed the directions so I have them for reference. The one thing I have come to realize is that my cadre mates have my back and if I get lost or stuck they will be there to help me. So, I began the program. It took me about 45 minutes of playing with the program to figure out what I was to do. It really helped having the directions next to me. Before I began I read the postings of others to see what they had learned and where they were headed. I began plugging in numbers and watched the machine work. I didn't get much out of the session as I wasn't sure what I was looking for.

Day 3: Small Breakthrough!

This evening I spent more time with the program and had a small breakthrough. I found that if you take a number and multiply it by 2, then the generation of the multiplied number is one more than the original number. I also turned it around and said if you divide the number by 2 then the generation of the half number is one less than the original number. However, this part is untrue because some of the numbers when divided by 2 does not produce a positive whole number, they produce a decimal. One of my cadre mates pointed the error out to me and other cadre mates pointed out that the first part remained true. Therefore I modified my hypothesis by dropping the division idea. I felt pretty good at having found this very small pattern.

Day 4: Back to the Beginning!

Okay today started the second part of the adventure with the overnight generator and the graphing. I can say that for this particular part of the adventure, I am lost and stumped. I don't see what we are supposed to do. I was reading the posts of others and have no clue what they are speaking of. I am not sure what the graph is supposed to represent. I can run the machine but have no idea what I am supposed to do with the data. the data for the runs I have done make no sense to me. One of my cadre mates has created new code and maybe tomorrow I will try his code to see what the difference is between what he did and what the 3N program does. I am 100% unclear as to what the purpose of this part of the adventure is. I have posted my findings for my cadre mates hoping that one of them can tell me the significance of the numbers and the relating generations of numbering. I will work on this more tomorrow to see if there is more clarity. Maybe the fogginess is the exhaustion I feel after a long week at work! :) Tomorrow is a new day and we will see what it brings on this adventure.

The Last Days:

Okay I have spent the last couple of hours trying to figure out what I was trying to prove/disprove or notice as far as patterns go with no luck. I have no deeper understanding of this program than I did when I started. I can say with sincere honesty that I went from apprehension at the beginning of the adventure to elation to intrigue to confusion by the end of the adventure. The apprehension was relieved by taking a deep breath and diving into the program with the directions right next to me. The elation was due to the success I achieved when finding a pattern using the basic part of the program. The intrigue came with adding the overnight and graphing tool. I spent hours running different numbers through the program and then sitting down to see what patterns I could see. I really wanted to find a profound pattern to share with my cadre mates and instructor. The confusion came when I began to read what others were doing. Their terminology was above my thought level and the graphs didn't look like mine. Even though I was confused, I continued to work with the program trying to figure out what I was doing and looking for or at. By the end, I had no better knowledge of what I was doing then when I started as far as the program went. However, I did learn a lot about myself and working together with my cadre mates. So here is what I learned:

1. I have a tendency to panic first and then settle down to work.

2. My apprehension of patterns stems from educational experiences of the past and I have to overcome them.

3. I like it when I am successful and can contribute to the team effort. On the other side, I don't like it when I feel that I am out of the loop and not a contributing member to the process. This leads to feelings of failure and withdrawal from the process and group.

4. The ability to post my feelings and questions for my cadre mates to read was a wonderful benefit. It allowed for the understanding that all of us were in different places. I was able to voice my concerns and find that I was not alone in the apprehension or confusion. This allowed me to continue working on the project despite the feelings of failure. It was also nice to see the help offered by my cadre mates. We were able to discuss the program and what we were learning. We were able to build off each other and grow through the adventure together.

Overall, this adventure was compelling and intriguing. Even though I don't feel that I mastered the program or the point it was trying to make, I did learn from it. I learned about myself and the process I undergo when learning!!

Comedian Reflection

When we were assigned this adventure I wasn't really sure how much I would get out of it. After all, how is a video/movie going to enlighten me as to education theories and ideas? I was also somewhat apprehensive over the content that could be contained within this video. I can honestly say that I was pleasantly surprised to find that all the apprehension was unfounded.

First let me say that the video was nothing like I thought it would be. I thought the film was about a group of comedians getting together to do a show. Instead, I was pleasantly surprised to see that it was the story of trying to become a successful comedian. There was a lot to the video that tied into the class.

We will start with the first noticable tie in for me was realizing that the comedians had a culture that was all their own. They had their own community of practice. In order for you to belong you had to have reached a certain level of success, know, understand and love stand-up comedy. As a presenter the comedians had to be aware of their audience and the culture they were addressing. The other part of this that brought Bruner to mind was that if you are in the audience and don't understand the culture that the comedian is discussing you won't get their jokes. It reminded me of teaching, as an instructor you have to be aware of the culture and community in which you are teaching. If you come in with no understanding of the culture or life that the students are living, then you stand the risk of having them disenegage from the task or classroom environment. The comedians pulled their material from their own experience. They use their knowledge of their culture and community to create their jokes for their routine. One comedian actually had his jokes arranged by cultures or audience types.

The other thing I noticed was the reflection period by the various artists/comedinans. Right after the show, they spoke about what worked and what didn't. When they got together as a group, they often shared their experience with each other. Those that were newer to the circuit sought the guidinace of those with more experience. The more experienced comedians also bounced ideas off of one another. They discussed their successes and failures. The tone was serious but fun when they interacted together. The give and take that took place was interesting to see. The other thing that was interesting to see was watching the heiracrchy of the comedians develop. From the perspective of someone that sees the comedians on the same level of "expertise", it was fascinating to see the "awe" that some of the comedians had for the comedians that had been around for a while. The newer comedians looked to those with more experience for guidance and input in their routines. The comedians learned from one another and worked together to build a better and stronger community.

There was one other factor that I noted in the video; the motivation factor. The comedians that appeared to be motivated by desire and love of comedy, were truly more interested in learning from each other and drawing from the experience of others. They were better in their delivery and read of the audience. The one comedian that appeared motivated by the desire for fame and fortune didn't fair as well with his audience and delivery. Motivation leads to a deeper engagement in the material or career one chooses to interact with.

It still amazes me that a single film viewed from a different perspective than normal could yield so much information.

Reflection on Stager Video

There are so many thoughts running through my mind currently that I am not sure where to begin. So this blog will probably sound random and rambling but it is all that Gary's video brought to mind.

First let me say a big thank you to Gary Stager for taking the time to try something new and creating this video. It truly opened up a lot of thoughts and reflection on my part.

Okay here we go. While I was listening to Gary speaking about his experiences about feeling smart and not so smart, my heart hurt for the young man made to feel inferior by his math teacher. It began me thinking back as to what I do in my classroom. Am I without conscious thought sending that type of message to a student within my classroom? It is something that needs to watched for and addressed. I want to be that educator that Gary talks about that opens the doors to the future not closes them. In fact, that is what my action research is all about so this video just reinforces those thoughts. When Gary was talking about the teacher that took the time to get to know him and allowed him to excel at the programming, I thought back to when I first started teaching. When I first entered the classroom, I was that teacher that reached out to students, that wasn't afraid to try new things and ways to engage students, and that was willing to go that extra mile for the students within my classroom. I truly think there were two reasons for this. First, I was working with a dynamic team of teachers, that had the opportunity to meet at lunch to discuss our common students and the challenges we were facing within the classroom. I was able to get tips and techniques about students from the educators with more experience. This gave me confidence in myself and trying new things. The second factor was that there was no state mandated test. We were still held accountable for what our students learned, yet the focus was on assisting the students in becoming well rounded individuals, not test takers. Over the past 8 or so years, the shift to ensuring that every student can score well on the test has taken that fire and risk taking out of the classroom. Listening to Gary just reaffirmed that it is time to take that risk to move in a new direction where my students are engaged and motivated.

The other part of Gary's message that stood out for me was the story about his college experience and the teacher's message about his potential lack of college success. It made me think back to my son's educational experience. Patrick was blessed and fortunate to find teachers within his high school years that went the extra mile, from making the curriculum content relevant to him to having students over on the weekends to study and look at calcus in a new light. Then there was his wonderful college counselor that sat with him for hours on end getting to know him and showing him the variety of types of colleges that were out there. Because this counselor got to know my son, she gently steered him away from the bigger "name recognition" colleges to the smaller colleges. This was because she knew that Patrick wanted the opportunity to get to know his professors, as he had gotten to know his high school teachers. He wanted the personal experience of college not the number experience of college. (No disrepect to any college out there or graduate from any college, just relating my son's experience.) Patrick selected the colleges to apply to based on size and feel. (We toured seven colleges, five of them East coast). When Patrick stepped on to the Dartmouth campus, he looked at me and said this is it. The experience, though short in nature, was one that brought him wonderful memories and the closeness with his professors that he sought.

To sum all this up: 1. It is up to me to determine how I engage my students and allow the learning experience to develop. I must move beyond the "norm" to the risk taking because that is what my students need to be successful. 2. Watch my words and actions carefully, you never know the full impact of what you do. 3. Be willing to admit my lack of knowledge to my students and learn together with them. 4. Leave the classroom management to the students, they will not allow those around them to disrupt their learning if they are engaged. (this will be the hardest part for me).

Thank you again Professor Stager for the time and the motivation to move beyond the "norm".

"Turtle" Learning Adventure

Okay. I have been working on this "turtle" adventure for over 20 hours and have reached the limit of my patience. I was finally able to get the turtle to create my single patch. It took me hours just to create a basic patch. When I see what the others within the cadre did, I don't even want to share my patch as it looks like a first grade drawing compared to college artists work. Despite this I continued to work on the patch to get it to work correctly. After hours of working on my own and wanting to throw the computer through the window, I finally sent out an SOS e-mail. I sent an e-mail to my cadre mates (God bless them!!) with questions as to what to do to get it to work. They responded promptly which was appreciated. I was able to speak with two of them over the phone and they were able to talk me through the glitches as well as explain the code for quilting. After speaking with them, I was able to look at the code for my patch and see my error and fix it. I then decided to give myself a break before trying to tackle the quilting. I was working on it for over four hours and still not getting it to work. So I sent out another SOS e-mail hoping that my cadre mates could point me in the direction of success. This time the help came in the use of the "google wave". Using the wave, I was able to communicate directly with one of my cadre mates and work on the problem together. We combined the "wave" with an e-mail and success was achieved. Or a least my version of success. Without the help of my cadre mates there would have been no success achieved as I would have just walked away from this assignment.

The feeling of failure in this adventure is great. My patch is basic and I can't even figure out basic code. The really hard part is that one of the next assignments in another class also involves programming and writing code. I am no looking forward to it with any sort of joy only with severe anxiety. The nice thing is that I now my cadre mates will be there to lend me a hand when I get stuck. I just wish I had the ability to assist them as they have helped me.

Learning Adventures Reflection

We have journeyed on three adventures to date in class. The first adventure on hereos and martyrs brought home the point that you need to be careful about biases in research and information. The personal perspective is important but you need to carefully examine your data and procedure to ensure that your biases have not crept into the project. It also emphasised the importance of making sure that you examine closely the sources you are using. If you are not careful, you could wind up on looking only for research that reinforces your biases instead of showing the whole picture. The second and third adventures brought home, for me, the importance of personal connection and learning. The second adventure involved using a music program to create a musical composition. During this adventure, all I could think about was how I couldn't wait to just get the composition done and move on. I had no connection to the program therefore I had neither the desire to excel at the compostion nor the drive to explore the program further. If I had been sitting in a classroom, my eyes would have been glazed over and my mind wandering to anywhere except class. (I have, sad to say, personally seen this expression on my students faces!) With the third adventure, exploring space, I could feel the excitement building everytime I used the program. The ideas began flowing fast and furious as I got into the program. I was able to picture how to use it in my classroom and the expression on the student's faces. Due to the connection I had with the program, my desire to explore the program built and I was able to find add-ons that could be used to send my students on their own personal journey through space. The difference in how I felt from adventure 2 and adventure 3, reminded me of the importance of facilitating a connection between my students and the curriculum content. It means that I am going to have to move out of my comfort zone and into a new world of mutual input between my students and myself. I am not sure where the remainder of this class will take me, but I can already see personal growth. I am a better educator today, then I was a few weeks ago. I have no doubt that as we progress through this program, I will learn even more that will make me an even better educator. Looking forward to the next adventure!

Community of Practice

I just finished my project for the community of practice. I elected to observe at a skateboard park. During the observations I saw that the skate park was not just for skateboarders but also for the BMX bike riders. It was truly amazing to watch the interaction between the two groups. They had the same type of heirarchy in both groups. The more experienced riders and boarders were given the first dib on the bowls they used to do their tricks. Once they were finished the less experienced would take over the bowls and attempt the tricks they saw the other "experts" do. There was a lot of interaction between the "experts" and the beginners as far as teaching and offering advice on completing the tricks. The ironic things was that they would only skate for 5 - 10 minutes then they would sit under the trees and talk for the next 30 - 45 minutes. The experience was a good one. Here is the video of the experience. Hope you enjoy it!!